Yesterday we dumped what were once, five years ago, state of the art computers. Probably like twenty of them. One of my managers rounded up all the guys and instructed us to gather the aged computers and dispose of them. I do not know why she picked yesterday of all days to do so when they have been sitting there since I started this job but I guess that is why I am not the one making the important decisions. Apparently I have to work in the professional setting 5-10 years before I get to decide when to take out the trash.
As we were taking the computers to their new home, there was a funny little box sitting next to them. I asked if this was trash, too. It was. I’ve never seen a box like this before, so naturally I was a bit curious. It was about the size of a rectangular, modest-sized Christmas present. I bend down to pick it up and upon gripping it I discovered that little box weighed about 50 pounds. Why the hell would something that looks like it weighs maybe 5 pounds weigh 50? It had a bunch of power outlets on the back so my first thought was that it might be some sort of original steam-powered surge protector.
I can just imagine the pioneers of the young surge protector business, able to finally harness the power of electricity for an extra minute so they could properly power down their coal-fueled computers without causing a boiler explosion. This invention might have single handedly reduced the once abundant British orphan population that was so reliant on pre-industrial revolution computers in early 19th century America. Barons would soon arise to dominant the surge protector business such as…well to be honest I don’t know any brand names for surge protectors and do not feel like googling it. Point is, I was holding a piece of computer history in my hands.
Lost in fanciful dreams, a co-worker of mine brought me back to 2008 when he asked what I was doing. I told him I was curious as to what the thing I was holding did. Very flatly he stated it was a backup lead battery. No imagination, no charm, just your run of the mill battery. He then exited the room. It made sense when I think about my car battery and when I had to replace that. The damn thing weighed a ton, and so too, did this battery. Fraternal twins separated at birth, the batteries would lead competing lives. Like Romulus and Remus, the batteries vied for superiority. In the end, I use a car battery still and did not know what a backup lead battery even looked like prior to yesterday.
I heaved the lead battery into the trash, but for my arrogance was punished by the fallen god. The lead battery sliced open my thumb leaving me to forever wonder when my last Tetanus shot was.
As we were taking the computers to their new home, there was a funny little box sitting next to them. I asked if this was trash, too. It was. I’ve never seen a box like this before, so naturally I was a bit curious. It was about the size of a rectangular, modest-sized Christmas present. I bend down to pick it up and upon gripping it I discovered that little box weighed about 50 pounds. Why the hell would something that looks like it weighs maybe 5 pounds weigh 50? It had a bunch of power outlets on the back so my first thought was that it might be some sort of original steam-powered surge protector.
I can just imagine the pioneers of the young surge protector business, able to finally harness the power of electricity for an extra minute so they could properly power down their coal-fueled computers without causing a boiler explosion. This invention might have single handedly reduced the once abundant British orphan population that was so reliant on pre-industrial revolution computers in early 19th century America. Barons would soon arise to dominant the surge protector business such as…well to be honest I don’t know any brand names for surge protectors and do not feel like googling it. Point is, I was holding a piece of computer history in my hands.
Lost in fanciful dreams, a co-worker of mine brought me back to 2008 when he asked what I was doing. I told him I was curious as to what the thing I was holding did. Very flatly he stated it was a backup lead battery. No imagination, no charm, just your run of the mill battery. He then exited the room. It made sense when I think about my car battery and when I had to replace that. The damn thing weighed a ton, and so too, did this battery. Fraternal twins separated at birth, the batteries would lead competing lives. Like Romulus and Remus, the batteries vied for superiority. In the end, I use a car battery still and did not know what a backup lead battery even looked like prior to yesterday.
I heaved the lead battery into the trash, but for my arrogance was punished by the fallen god. The lead battery sliced open my thumb leaving me to forever wonder when my last Tetanus shot was.
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