Wednesday, April 16, 2008


In things that depress me news, a group of 4 out of Birmingham, Alabama is suing Southwest Airlines over safety and contractual violations. I saw this coming the instant I read the initial report on Southwest’s little hiccup.

The lawsuit covers an estimated 10,000 people who flew Southwest over a period when safety inspections were relaxed and planes were allowed to reschedule their six-month regular visit to the Plane dentist, so to speak. At a time when airlines are scrambling to figure out ways to make flying profitable, some jackoff wants to take advantage of the situation and see how many dimes he can shake out. Call me crazy, but suing one of the most affordable airlines in the world over something that NEVER happened doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to the consumer.

Already facing a possible 10 million dollar fine, add the cost of litigation and possible settlement to an already volatile market and what do you get? Cheaper plane tickets and safer airplanes? No and no. What you get is creative customer fees to compensate. $20 for extra leg room sound familiar? $25 for a second bag?

What’s even more disgusting about this situation is that the people suing will likely champion safety as their number 1 concern, not monetary gain. I would be more okay with the situation if the plaintiffs just came out and stated that they saw an opportunity to get money and jumped at the chance because they are greedy people that have no work ethic. I would be fine with that.

What’s yet more disturbing is the support of lawsuits like this. People will likely rally behind this lawsuit and attempt to claim their piece of the pie. I’ve flown Southwest practically my whole life and if I get a check in the mail based on the outcome of this settlement I will just return it to sender and write on the check, thanks but no thanks.


When I need money I think I am going to go around and test the tire pressure of all our city bus tires. Then, when I inevitably discover that it is lower than it should be because tires leak air over time (like stress cracks a fuselage over time) I will find some crackpot lawyer who is willing to work for nothing but a percentage of a potential settlement, and sue the city. Of course, I will make sure to claim I was just looking out for the safety of those who ride the bus, mention how precious children lives are, maybe throw in the environment and I should be a millionaire in 6-8 months. In a nutshell, that is what’s going on in ‘Bama right now. LONG LIVE THE SOUTH!

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